Monday, January 19, 2009

RHOC



I know I am a week behind with this episode. I don't even know what to say about Tamra's "Etiquette Party", so I'm not going to say anything at all about it right now! I'd rather write about Episode 7 where all the housewives attended a horse race at the Del Mar Race Track. I am disappointed in Tamra and Vicki's behavior! While I find it really entertaining, it was mean! This is why I've always loved Jeanna. She is the only truly classy one! Even in the midst of the drunken debauchery going on last week, she was quietly doing the right thing giving Gretchen water and trying to steer her in the right direction...away from Tamra! She was just a little classier.

Anyway, this episode really hit home for me. Recently, I've been going through some changes. Perhaps I'm growing up a bit and I'm starting to notice myself handling situations with my friends differently. I am starting to stand up for myself in a way I never have in the past and I'm not tolerating people treating me poorly.

This picture really says it all.
Lynne said at one point in this episode, "I'm just trying to be friends with these ladies. I don't know what their problem is." I feel you, Lynne! In my quest for true friendship, I attempted to get closer with a group of girls, one of whom is in my wedding. She's lovely and I've known her a while. She and I have a group of mutual friends, and she also has another group she hangs out with. Their husbands are all buddies and the girls have a book club. Only it seems I (and B by default) are not really welcome in this group. I received the message this Fall, and have since backed off. I'm over it now and have done much refection and realized that their snobbery really says more about them than it does about me. Now that I've accepted this, I feel comfortable writing about it! But I just felt so badly for Lynne, because I understand! My friend is like Jeanna and is just cool with everybody, but some of the other girls acted like Tamra and Vicki.

In addition to all that, one of my other bridesmaids and my "best" friend hasn't spoken to me in 6 weeks! The crazy part? I'm not upset! I actually feel much more relaxed. Like a weight has been lifted. She was putting a lot of pressure on me to maintain a level of friendship she was not willing to give. Perhaps we weren't really best friends after all?

Maybe 2009 is a time for me to "clean house". I know that's strange to say, but I have some great friends in my life. People who I am so grateful to be able to call friends! Why should I allow other "friends" make me unhappy? I'd rather work on nurturing my good friendships. But what to do about the wedding? Have any of you gone through something like this? Its almost like a cleanse for my life! Thanks goodness sometimes of all my "bloggy friends"!

8 comments:

Molly said...

I totally know what you mean! It is so hard to just accept things. Good for you for realizing this, I have a hard time still and may always until I hit the point you have! I'd totally just go with who you is your friend NOW. And don't worry to much!

Randall @ Happy For This Moment said...

Oh that show is the best - I cannot get enough. Looking forward to tomorrow night's new episode!

Julie said...

Very well said! As I get older, I have started to realize that I don't have time for friends that are mean, demanding, etc... my one friend and I always talk about having quality friends (versus # of friends, which I think was more important when we were younger). I do love RHOC... even though Vicki and Tamara are SO MEAN - especially when they called it the "chubby table!" Sorry for the rambling :)

Polka Dots & Protein Bars said...

I totally understand what you mean. I think every friendship has a season, and once you both move to different places, friendships fade. I know you will create stronger, deeper relationships soon. Good luck, and know that many of us feel your pain! (or non-pain as your case might be :-) )

Preppy 101 said...

Oh yes. You will find that from time to time you will have to "cut People lose". . . anyone in your life who does not "lift you up" needs to be "cut loose" - or if they are users - same fate! But it all works out in the end!! Honestly, I am not just saying that!

The Pink Tutu said...

So sorry to hear about your situation. Sounds like you are being the bigger person and taking the high road. So yay for you rising above it all!

Piper Jacquelyn said...

I can 100% relate to what you're going through with your friends. I went through that a few years ago and realized that people I had thought were true, lovely people, were actually NOT at all what I wanted to be like or be associate with. It's hard, but in the long run, so much better. I love my new friends, they are good people (not self-absorbed or mean) and love me! Good luck with your friends! Gosh - I hope this all made sense, ha!

GIRL FROM THE LAND of 10KL said...

Its crazy about best friends, huh? I thought my best friend would always be my best friend, but I consider my boyfriend to my best friend now. My old best friend (Maggie) and I are still close, but I think as you grow older, people change and grow apart. The good thing about true friends, is that you don't have to talk to them for a few weeks, and when you finally pick up the phone, it's like no time has passed at all.

Anyway, don't let it get to you =) Sounds like your crazy busy enough planning for your big day!

Have a great week!

P.s. I love Real Housewives of the O.C. I think Jena is my fav, now that Laurie has left the show.